Monday: NYC Happenings

Hello New York Movers,

Spring has sprung and I for one am jubilant, or at least, as jubilant as my Botox will allow me to express. I’m back from my country residence in Connecticut and love being back in the city. The change of the seasons is a special time for me, one where I can switch out my closet and proudly display all the fashionable trends for the season – a secret that only rich folks know about by way of a heavily-guarded newsletter. (You didn’t hear it from me, but amethyst and baby teeth are a big trend this spring!) In an effort to stay one step ahead of the curve, I’ve once again provided you plebeians with another helping of cultural happenings. It’s my charity work for the year and it’s fully tax-deductible. Along with my vampire facials and massage therapists.

High Culture: Museum in TriBeCa

In this case “high culture” means “conceptual,” but we all must try and dabble in the modern arts  – after all, we can’t spend the rest of our lives staring at the same Vermeers and Monets tastefully displayed in our sitting rooms. Museum is a pop-up gallery residing in a restored 60-square-foot freight elevator on Cortlandt Alley and is worth a visit. Featuring a mishmash of found objects, including an index card detailing a pot dealer’s pricing scale, this year is certain to have another bevy of strange and unusual pieces. And of course, the gallery is entirely free, which I know is in your price range.

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Low Culture: The Orchid Show @ New York Botanical Garden

It’s spring, which means that once again the New York Botanical Garden is busting out it’s newest exhibition. Featuring lush landscapes from around the globe, the New York Botanical Garden is a perfect way to spend the afternoon if you don’t have the means to hire a private jet and fly to Bora Bora. I feel so sorry for you.

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Culture Culture: Beef

It’s couture to be ahead of the curve. This is why you should eat a cow before it even has time to lactate. It’s what any sensible trendsetter would do.

Stay cultured my friends,

#Ant

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